What is the best and fastest way to handle your constant battle with your teenage kids?

My son drains my energy by arguing over almost every little things, being unreasonable to us, talking rudely and calling names. He does not respect his parents and even call his dad and his sister's names like idiot, jerks,stupid,etc. He dares to shout back, rebel and refuse his dad's order on time out but not mine as I have been very tough and stand my ground firmly when he misbehaves. I could not stand my husband tolerant of him when he calls him names and was disgusted how spine-less he is as a man. Now we are on our way to divorce. My daughter on the other hand is very well behave, very reasonable. Both of them are great students and certainly there s no suspicion of abuse of any kind in school/home. The thing about my son is when he is in a good mood, he is such a thoughtful sweet little guy. He seems to have mood swing and I am now beginning to ponder could it be a mental/medical health related problem.